Finding Forward
I don't always know which direction is forward, but walking with good friends makes it a lot easier to figure out.
This morning, I did my first study presentation at SGI’s Brooklyn Center. SGI, Soka Gakkai International, is a Nichiren Buddhist organization rooted in dedicating one’s life to their own happiness. It’s a practice that I officially adopted in June of this year and was excited about, but I didn’t expect to meet so many people who would hold me accountable to showing up for myself.
Nikita is one of the first friends I made at SGI. She doesn’t just tell me, but commands me to shine as often as she can. Chanting together on Sundays at the Brooklyn Center is always one of the most encouraging parts of my week. But this week’s meeting was a particularly meaningful one.
On Friday, Nikita texted me asking if I’d be willing to present the Sunday meeting’s Buddhist study by writing about an article from this week’s publication called “World Tribune”. It was a really tough week, I wasn’t sure that I had it in me to add one more thing to my weekend when all I wanted to do was zone out and be by myself.
But then I thought, “Izzie, you look for every opportunity to share your unsolicited thoughts and feelings with anyone who might sort of like them... are you really going to pass up the chance to do exactly that when you’re being ASKED to, for the PERFECT audience???” No way. Despite it being an incredibly emotional week, it was time to show up and do my thing.
So I said “Of course I will! Thank you so much for asking me to.” and started poring over recent World Tribune articles, looking for something that felt timely and authentic to my current experience. I found an article called, “The Benefits of Moving Together” and it spoke to me right away. I’ve been grappling with finding a healthy sense of community among other poets and writers. Supporting one another is so much easier said than done for anyone with even a slight ego. I like to think I keep mine in check but she’s definitely still there and starts fires over stupid things all the time. This article helped me reframe how I experience the jealousy I feel when I see fellow writers and poets garner success and accolades and incredible opportunities.
I read the below in today’s meeting, I hope it’s just as encouraging for you as it was for me to write.
Good morning everyone! My name is Izzie Zuniga and I practice in Central Slope District, in the Park Slope Chapter. Thank you for allowing me to share the study presentation with you all today.
I wanted to share a few paragraphs that resonated with me from the Buddhist Study section of World Tribune titled “The Benefits of Moving Together, on Page 9.
“Did you know that simply walking with someone can strengthen your relationship with them? Research shows that “social walking” helps us understand others. Neurologist Shane O’Mara noted that human beings mirror others’ movements and brain activation patterns.
Walking together, we instinctively synchronize our steps and maybe even the movement of our arms and legs, breathing or heart rate. It can elicit our brain’s “social cognition,” how we observe, process, store and use information—like gestures, expressions or other social cues—to predict the other person’s trajectory. This synchronization can form a basis for good relationships.
Walking with someone stimulates shared attention, causing us to look and move forward in the same direction, creating a shared experience of progressing toward a common goal.
Psychologist David Krauss writes: “Synchronous movements seem to prompt greater experience of self-other overlap. Self-other overlap is associated with more compassion and concern for others, more helping behaviors and resource sharing.”
Activities like walking, dancing, playing music or exercising in step with others helps us better connect with those around us. In the SGI, we emphasize the importance of “running” or taking action with fellow Buddhists as we talk, visit, chant and study with others. The synchronicity of moving together toward our shared goal of widely spreading Nichiren Buddhism’s tenets of respect, equality and peace—what we call kosen-rufu—helps us develop compassion and strengthen our ties.
Sensei writes: Striving alongside Josei Toda, I have advanced straight ahead on the path of kosen-rufu. It is the path of human revolution, the path of victory in life. It is the path for realizing happiness for all people, for transforming the karma of humankind and for creating a future of world peace. It is also the great path of the oneness of mentor and disciple throughout the three existences of past, present and future.”
I was especially encouraged by this article in particular as I work to grow my presence in the community of poets and writers. Writers, as well as many other artists, often experience a double edged sword with community. There is immense gratitude that comes from enjoying the work of others, continued learning, and the support system of people who experience similar obstacles. But also… I feel an extreme form of jealousy when I see the successes of other writers, especially when I don’t feel the same fulfillment yet. There is also a deep frustration that comes with being surrounded by artistic methods and schools of thought that I disagree with.
I find myself battling between seeing my community as both friend and foe, as supporters but also competitors. This article simultaneously reminds me that,
People are always stronger together, especially when they are moving in the same direction.
Encountering those who are further along in their path than I feel my path has blossomed into thus far are not opponents, but guides, who continue to light a path that I know I am meant to walk.
The success of others, is also a success for me and vice versa. Sharing values and direction with one another, whether they’re manifested in the same way or not, is a win for everyone in the bigger picture.
I am determined to continue to encourage those I meet along my path, remain open to those who create differently from me, and turn jealous thoughts into inspiration.
With all of that in mind, I started to think about jealousy like money: it doesn’t matter how much you have, what matters is what you turn it into.
With love, encouragement, and always a tiny bit of jealousy,
Izzie
Thanks for sharing, Izzie!